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A Living Testimony
by Pamela

I am a 34 year old single mother of one 11 year old daughter. I am happy now but it was not always so. I was raised to believe in Christ but never was made to go to church nor was I kept from it. Church was there if I chose it, but as a child, other things become more important if not taught from the beginning that your salvation is more important than anything you could ever imagine.

I was 22 when I became pregnant with my daughter. Unmarried and very alone. I still was hard hearted and even though my grandmother tried so hard to get me to church I felt unwanted so I chose not to go. When my daughter was born I was alone and unemployed so you can imagine the things I had to endure. I felt that I must be punished for something. I did not understand at the time that God does not punish us we punish ourselves when we do not follow His plan for us. When we step out of His protection anything can and will happen to us.

I began to go from relationship to relationship searching for whatever it was I was missing in my life unaware that it was Christ I needed. It was not until Christmas 2 years ago when my brother Gerald sent me a book entitled, "Living above your Circumstances". This book changed my life and I will always cherish it. I don't think my brother knew at the time that he just won me over to Christ. I guess I just did not understand a lot of things and the book made sense to me. I began to live differently and to rely on God for answers not on myself or my friends. I began to put my burdens on His shoulders and my life began to change. I was single mother living off of $200.00 a week trying to keep a roof over my child's head. Now I am engaged to a wonderful man and have a new job making almost twice what I was making and am finally happy. It is hard for me to say that because I had been in a state of depression for so long it is even hard to deal with such happiness sometimes. Sometimes I feel very undeserving.

When I decided to let him lead me, my life changed and I know so many people that could have such happiness in their lives if they would do the same. I learned that delay is not denial -- pray on. He is not saying NO he is just saying NOT YET!



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January 16, 2000

For God so loved the world ...